I have like three options right now, which is nice, but also horrifying.
I’m done. —for a while at least— I mean, I’ll go to the concert, but I’m not feeling her feeling it.
Lord, let me have sex with Emily Ratajkowski. Please.
This guy who takes improv classes with me just moved seats away from me because I told him I didn’t like Hillary Clinton. What a creep.
I haven’t been home in such a long time that I don’t think I can actually handle going back. It’s not true that I’ve “avoided” returning home, I just have nothing left there besides my family (who comes out to Chicago every few months) and a friend from high school. It’s interesting how I really only stay in contact with two person I went to high school with, probably because I’ve found more than enough people here to take their place. It’s sad, almost. Almost. But it’s not as sad as knowing people exclusively from high school, or returning back home and staying like the countless failures turned out of the great machine that everyone so desperately relies on for some sick and twisted comfort in knowing that things will always stay just so, and you can always eat at the Lobster House and go to the beach, and you can always become essentially nothing as far as the rest of humanity is concerned and be perfectly content in basking in the Memorial to Labor Day sun. It’s exhausting. I have some ties, but they are loose. The last tight ones were cut some months ago. C’est la vie, c’est la guerre.
when the southern air
through the hands of ghosts;
men being gentle amongst that
awful will to love, but when you
and i sense my people lurch
across a country so vast
to only find the plains before
mountains—someone for so long,
because after years i am no longer
surprised, i can no longer hate,
—, settled down unto dust
and slowly ascend into a greatness,
into her vacant arms,
and beyond their own indomitable
flight—god and why
this, our land turns
Insanity reigns king.
Hannah by Ray Lamontagne is the most beautiful song every written. If you disagree with me, fuck you.
My band is going into the studio in two weeks to record our EP. It should be fun. It is fun being an indie artist.